Welcome to Ali-land

Finally figuring it out.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Pretty accurate

I thought this was a fitting descprition of me.

You Are 4: The Individualist
You are sensitive and intuitive, with others and yourself.You are creative and dreamy... plus dramatic and unpredictable.
You're emotionally honest, real, and easily hurt.Totally expressive, others always know exactly how you feel.
At Your Best: You are inspired, artistic, and introspective. You know what you're thinking, and you can communicate it well.
At Your Worst: You are melancholy, alienated, and withdrawn.
Your Fixation: Envy
Your Primary Fear: To have no identity
Your Primary Desire: To find yourself
Other Number 4's: Alanis Morisette, Johnny Depp, J.D. Salinger, Jim Morrison, and Anne Rice.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Finding comfort *sappy post but all true*



It's always difficult to end a relationship. Whether it's a past love or a friendship, the loss is still a healed scar that was once a gaping hole. I often wonder if it's our pain that causes our hearts to give out when we grow old. Sure, the muscle gets weak and tired from pumping blood or our minds are shutting down, causing other organs to fail. However, when it comes to our emotions, our hearts, we forget that those wounds are there and they often surprise us when they sting even years later.

We often spend time thinking of the past and planning for the future. It's difficult to stay in the moment. It's one of the reasons I love acting. It's impossible to NOT be in the moment if you are doing it "right". Recently I've found another way to stay in the moment. Riding my bike causes me to be defensive, noticing everything around me, watching the cars, aware of my surroundings. Yet, when I'm just cruising at night with no cars, I'm conscious of the moment, the now. It's me, alone, and I'm feeling the wind in my hair or the sun on my face and I'm sweaty and THERE. It's beautiful. It's elegant. It's inspiring. It's like love.

I'm glad to have found another way to keep my focus on the now. It helps me keep a positive attitude and I'm reminded that I can feel the love around me.

Working on Envoy has saved me. My old friends (Lisa, Jon, Lucy, Ben, Carin, Christine, Belinda) and my new friends (Jenn, Caitlin, Steve, Mark, Grush, Molly, Summer, Laura, Darrin, Brandon, Matt, Jessica) I thank you. I'm honored to know all of you and even more so to get to work with you.

You are my comfort. My "staying in the moment". You continue to give and give and I'm grateful for it. On and off the stage.

I thank you.

I love you.